[NewMusic] Perfume of a Critic's Burning Flesh (weasel walter)

[Michael Henry]

>i rarely find many reviews that have any sort of valid criticism positive
>or negative. what passes for "music criticism" in many idioms consists of
>this very narrow style of exposition and description. it is cranked out
>with little effort or thought by the majority of these hacks. their
>self-importance is generally directly proportionate to their ineptitude. 

I was once present at a concert (in my undergraduate daze...at a reasonably major
conservatory), where Donald Erb was being honored, and in honor of Donald Erb
there was of course an all-Erb concert.

I sat behind Erb, who was seated next to my composition teacher (now deceased), and
afterwards, my teacher introduced Erb to the local music "critic" who was present.

This "critic" (who has since gone on to the "big apple" and I hate to say is widely 
quoted these days...well, OK....he pens crap for Neo-con Norman Podhoretz at Commentary, 
and is often in the found lurking in the same milieu of the likes of Alex Ross and 
such....a "witty pointificator" on many topics -- not just music, mind you -- but 
then, I digress)....anyway, he was introduced to Erb, and there was the usual 
obligatory handshaking, and the "critic" (initials "T.T." for those who are wondering) 
basically offered a few very lame, awkward, and idiotic platitudes (which left both Erb and 
my teacher rather stunned by their stupidity), and then he left.

I recall Erb turning to my teacher, and immediately asking (*standard disclaimer needs to be 
inserted here, since this was nearly 25 years ago, and my memory is therefore suspect) 

"THAT KID is your music critic?"

My teacher responded "Yes...he reviews concerts for the newspaper."

Erb then erupted and said "That BOY is a music critic? (TT was then maybe in his 20's) 

"Why, there should be a law that no person is allowed to criticize  a piece of new music 
until they are at least 60 years old, since you need to spend that many years familiarizing 
yourself with all kinds of music and all of music history in order to be able to pass 
judgment on anything that is new to your ears."

I have to admit that while physical age can be relative, Erb had a point. Much of the 
criticism/"reviews" I read today are (as WW so aptly described it) written by mindless 
pontificators whose "self-importance is generally directly proportionate to their ineptitude."

In other words, I can smell the burning flesh. Burn, baby...burn!